March 2008 Edition

shop talk

Machine workplace sayings

By Steve Rose

A busy life at the machine workplace often gives us a chance to observe situations seen with regular frequency.

So here are some observations I have collected from various people over the years.

One of my favorites is Murphy's Law: Whatever can go wrong, will go wrong. This is only one "rule" I have seen in operation in machine shops over the years. To add levity to the day, here are some favorites:

Management's view of "machine workplace training"

• These guys should learn machining in two to three weeks, even though it only took me four years to get my degree.

Laws

• Murphy's Law — Whatever can go wrong, will.
• Peter's Law — People are promoted to their level of incompetence.
• Parkinson's Law — Work expands to fill the time available.

Acronyms

• SNAFU — situation normal, all fouled up
• FUBAR — fouled up beyond all recognition
• SWAG — scientific wild-ass guess
• TEGO — the eyes glaze over (seen when running one job too long)

Truths

• The impossible is performed daily; miracles take a little longer.
• We never have time to do it right, but we always have time to do it over.
• A mistake? Well, that's the first one I've made since the last one.
• Things go bad; then they get worse.
• Good experiences promote change; bad experiences demand it.
• Definition of expert: Anyone more than 50 miles from home.
• Ten years experience = ten years of making mistakes.
• Pay rate — We all get paid the same — not enough.
• Wishful thinking does not get the job done.
• I don't like thinking — it hurts.
• There are no clean deals.

Shop life

• If analytical skill fails, what do we use? Brute force and ignorance.
• You never remember who helped you out, but you always remember who stood in your way.
• The machinist's theme song: "I Did It My Way."
• Our best customer is the scrap man — he never sends anything back.
• The best job is always the one you are going to or the one you left. It is never the one you have.
• How do we learn? Through pain.
• Keep in mind when learning programming: The machine thinks we know what we are doing.
• How many people work in your workplace? Half of them.
• We often see communication challenges between shifts. The machinist will often leave a note saying "running good." Roughly translated, "Good luck, I'm running out of here."
• What can go wrong — everything.

Situations never seen in the workplace:

• Self-image of a master machinist: "I can't improve on perfection,."
• There is a questionable part for a late delivery: "Ship it."
• The first thing a repairman looks for in your shop — the exit sign.
• Service tech's comments regarding the machine problem: ‘‘You are the first place that we have seen with this problem."
• Office staff's opinion of machinists: "If these guys can run a machine, it's got to be easy."

Steve Rose is a professional trainer and president of RTSI, Solon, OH. Rosaleen Rose offers Internet website development. They can be reached by phone at 440.542.3066; e-mail srose@rosetraining.com; or on the web at www.rosetraining.com.

Copyright Rose Training Systems Inc., 2008

What do you think?
Will the information in this article increase efficiency or save time, money, or effort? Let us know by e-mail from our website at www.ToolingandProduction.com or e-mail the editor at dseeds@nelsonpub.com.